A solution to spam

Spam is completely out of control, costing companies billions of dollars, wasting people’s time to sort through, and on top of everything else is often offensive on many levels. To combat the problem, all sorts of solutions are pondered in laboratories around the world–white lists, black lists, Bayesian filters, and other defenses of varying levels of desperation and cunning.

But when you think about it, spam is such a problem because it is very cheap to distribute. This means that a minuscule success rate is good enough for the spammer.

There are people out there displaying an utter, debilitating, and shocking lack of common sense by receiving a spam offering to have their tiny wangs enlarged for only $50 “without drugs or pumps!” and they order it! These people are very few, but there are enough of them to make spamming profitable.

Do you see where I’m going with this?

What we need to do, as a global society, is find those people and cut off their Internet access. Once those people are no longer on the Internet, spammers will not get any results, and they will stop spamming.

And then we will move to phase two of my Evil Plan…

Music: “Mars” by Emmanuel Top

Posted Monday, 15 December, 2003 by Nic Lindh

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