The Core Dump

A strong conviction that something must be done is the parent of many bad measures

[By Nic Lindh on Friday, 27 October 2006]

Awkward conversations with a four-year-old

One evening recently we were having a nice quiet dinner when Andrea asked me, “Do you have a round thing, daddy?”

“Ehm. A what?” I said, swallowing my spaghetti.

“A round thing. Like Bob.”

Bob is one of the boys at Andrea’s preschool.

“What do you mean a round thing like Bob, honey?”

Andrea rolled her eyes a little bit†. “A round thing! To pee-pee!”

“Oh.” Pause. “Oh.”

The Master Plan has been to keep the existence of the “round thing” outside Andrea’s awareness for a while longer, but since this anatomical cat was out of the bag, nothing to do but talk it through.

“How did you see Bob’s round thing?”

“When he went potty.”

“OK.”

A sigh of relief as the pervert-defcon status was downgraded.

“Do you have a round thing, daddy?”

I must admit that at this point I was searching quite hard for a graceful way out of the conversation, chewing on my spaghetti, and didn’t respond.

“Do you have a round thing, daddy?”

Seriously, toddlers are like the freaking Terminator when they want to know something.

“Yes, daddy has a round thing, too.”

A wise nod. “All boys have round things.”

“Yes, all boys have round things.”

“I don’t have a round thing.”

“No, that’s because you’re a girl.”

“Are you a boy, daddy?”

“Yes.”

“Because you have a round thing?”

“Yes, you’re a boy if you have a round thing. Only boys have round things. Now please eat your chicken nuggets.”

†Oh yeah, that bodes well for the future…

« Build it and they will crumble

 »


Enjoy the ten latest posts!

Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice

Impressions moving from an Apple Watch Series 3 to Series 5

Is there reason to upgrade from a 3 to a 5?

Plans are worthless, but planning is everything

Often injustice lies in what you aren’t doing, not only in what you are doing

Die in a ditch

After all these years, Nic still can’t understand the American attitude to healthcare.

The big thieves hang the little ones

Book roundup, part 29

A sci-fi and fantasy heavy installment that includes The Valedictorian of Being Dead, The Mastermind, Broadsword Calling Danny Boy, Tiamat’s Wrath, The Raven Tower, The Liberation, The Light Brigade and Cryptonomicon.

Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable

Book roundup, part 28

Includes The Incomplete Book of Running, Aching God, The Murderbot Diaries, Lies Sleeping, The Consuming Fire, and Rendezvous with Rama.

Las Vegas trip report

Did you know Las Vegas is kind of nutty?